I know the title isn't 100% inviting, but I've been gone for a long while I know. My psychiatric problem (bipolar) was worsening in the past few months so I closed my blog and closed my hosting account so I don't keep paying year after year without a website.
I'm hopeful that with this medication (as my psychiatrist says this medication is the best medication on the market for my type of condition (even though it requires monthly blood work (which of course I comply with because I want to be well)), I will remain out of the hospital for a long time. I'm still increasing the dose of the medication every other week right now until I get to a 300mg/day dose. I'm only @ approx 200mg/day dose right now (so it's another 100mg per day increase to go).
So I hope to be more active on the forums now that I'm doing much better, even though I no longer have a website or blog.
Man, to be honest I didn't notice you where gone. Because we both didn't know each other that well. But I am happy you are back and feel sorry and sad for you. For the situation you are in.
Will you ever fully recover or be able to live out your life like a common human?
Anyway great your back and keep on going, never give up.
Here is a poem I wrote for a guy who had trouble with life:
Life is long road ahead, we come to the point, shall I turn left or right ?
We try to follow this road, we make a decision we are proud and certain of.
This brings us to strange places, gives us opportunity and misery.
Life is a challenge we have to face, but when you find out the mystery of life and:
If you accept who you are, you get far.
We all sometimes make wrong decision, but this is balanced by the good moments in our life.
Having a good day is for all in a different way.
You must be happy with who you are, there is no one the same like you.
Being special is for all a experience in a other way.
Some feel it by going to family and friends, while others feel it when getting a compliment.
Life can sometimes be hard, but as long you know who you are and what you want.
Things can come true right at hand, try to make your dreams come true, and at most "belief in yourself."
I'm working on getting my life back together. I go to a program 3 days a week where I'm learning both symptom management and life skills so that I can learn to live in the community. My 2 life goals is to have a job and to one day get my own apartment through mental health housing (mainly because the rent would be lower (so that I could afford it).
I have a counselor who I have connections with when I go to program which is great. I also since early November started going to individual (1:1) therapy for the first time and I think that's making a big difference.
I've had bipolar since I was 15 but not diagnosed till 19 but though the 7 years Mom, my counselor at program, my case manager and my therapist see that I'm working very hard to get to where I want to be in life so that I can move on and live independently in the community.
I thank you for asking me questions. I never mind people asking me questions in relations to my mental health as long as it's not too too personal, but thanks for the question.
I hope this helps answer your question, and thanks for the poem. I'll use it and the serenity prayer to help me out every day to help me get though life day by day. That's how I live now so that I don't fall into the same pit falls I did years ago. I take things one day at a time so I don't overwhelm myself.
I'm doing a lot better now that I'm on the new medication and going to my program. Everyone tells me I look good and I feel good to.
I felt really good today. I went out to IHOP with my friend today and got to enjoy having breakfast with him. It was nice. I even got to try their international french vanilla coffee. It was great.
You do not know of me due to me only registering a little while ago but I have been a "lurker" on this forum for quite some time; upon "lurking" these forums I managed to pick up a fair few of your posts and you seemed to be a very helpful and kind person.
I hope that you are feeling better and I am sad that I was unable to read your blog -- I did however manage to skim through it a few times.
