gaileeflores
Up-and-Coming Sensation
before, so that when the time comes. you'd be ready. and know how to do "it" :lol:
Sex before or after marriage?
- Thread starter InFiNiTy™
- Start date
If you're going to have sex before marriage it's probably best to have protected sex so you're not going to have a child and break up with your partner. Even when you're married it's best to wait around a year after marriage so you know you can fully trust them to be with you eternally. 🙂
Black Angel
Resident
Sex before marriage is good, but sex after marriage is even better.
There are some things in life you shouldn't invest in without test driving it first.
Because in either case, if it all goes to sh-t after you've invested so much of your time, then you will be miserable and in many cases, there is no coming back from that.
If you wouldn't buy a car without test driving it first to see if it really is a good fit (no pun intended) then you shouldn't do the same with a person you are willing to spend the rest of your life with.
Sexual incompatibility is a very serious issue and most of the time the problems from it are not isolated to the body parts involved. It can have lasting consequences on the couple mentally, emotionally as well as sexually and when that happens, intimacy will suffer as a result.
As Dreadlord pointed out, safety is important, and just because you agreed to have sex with them doesn't mean that they, or you are doing so without boundaries or that you have to be their personal porn star or sex slave. You just have to have enough self-respect and self-control to set some boundaries and with NO exceptions.
For example, on 12/15 of this year, my husband and I will have been together for 13 years, and we were together for exactly 10 years when we got married in 2010. Although we had been living together and were having sex, there were certain privileges that were reserved only for my husband, and there were even some that were reserved only for my fiancé.
So whether we were together for 10 years or 20 more after that, there were certain things that I was not willing to compromise on because weren't married or engaged, and there were NO exceptions. Also, because we made the decision to live together first and also have sex throughout our relationship, there would have been no better way for us to know exactly how compatible we really are with each other.
It has actually made use closer as well, because to me, he isn't just my husband, but he's also my best friend and he feels the same way about me as well.
So my views on this are very similar to the idea of living together before marriage as well, since that would be the other thing that people should do before investing the rest of their lives with someone.
Entering this kind of commitment without any kind of litmus test for compatibility is foolish and a recipe for disaster. At least by having sex with them and/or living with them first, you will be making your investment into this person with eyes wide open and your judgment won't be affected as much as someone who did neither.
This is because, you'd be seeing them at their best as well as at their worst, complete with flaws and all, based on what you've seen, you can make a more informed decision and you can decide once and for all whether or not you'd want to be with them, compared to someone who has only seen the facade that the other person has put up whenever they are out on dates.
Oh, and a quick note about Michael Douglas, he is an excellent actor, but he is a freak, and this isn't because he is a sex addict. Now that i think of it, there isn't a movie of his that I've seen that didnt involve him having sex. So using him as proof against premarital sex is just as bad as using Charlie Sheen who collects porn stars like many kids collect Pokemon cards, and actually out-screwed Ron Jeremy, who IS a porn star or John Holmes, a porn star who died of AIDS in the 80's.
There are some things in life you shouldn't invest in without test driving it first.
Because in either case, if it all goes to sh-t after you've invested so much of your time, then you will be miserable and in many cases, there is no coming back from that.
If you wouldn't buy a car without test driving it first to see if it really is a good fit (no pun intended) then you shouldn't do the same with a person you are willing to spend the rest of your life with.
Sexual incompatibility is a very serious issue and most of the time the problems from it are not isolated to the body parts involved. It can have lasting consequences on the couple mentally, emotionally as well as sexually and when that happens, intimacy will suffer as a result.
As Dreadlord pointed out, safety is important, and just because you agreed to have sex with them doesn't mean that they, or you are doing so without boundaries or that you have to be their personal porn star or sex slave. You just have to have enough self-respect and self-control to set some boundaries and with NO exceptions.
For example, on 12/15 of this year, my husband and I will have been together for 13 years, and we were together for exactly 10 years when we got married in 2010. Although we had been living together and were having sex, there were certain privileges that were reserved only for my husband, and there were even some that were reserved only for my fiancé.
So whether we were together for 10 years or 20 more after that, there were certain things that I was not willing to compromise on because weren't married or engaged, and there were NO exceptions. Also, because we made the decision to live together first and also have sex throughout our relationship, there would have been no better way for us to know exactly how compatible we really are with each other.
It has actually made use closer as well, because to me, he isn't just my husband, but he's also my best friend and he feels the same way about me as well.
So my views on this are very similar to the idea of living together before marriage as well, since that would be the other thing that people should do before investing the rest of their lives with someone.
Entering this kind of commitment without any kind of litmus test for compatibility is foolish and a recipe for disaster. At least by having sex with them and/or living with them first, you will be making your investment into this person with eyes wide open and your judgment won't be affected as much as someone who did neither.
This is because, you'd be seeing them at their best as well as at their worst, complete with flaws and all, based on what you've seen, you can make a more informed decision and you can decide once and for all whether or not you'd want to be with them, compared to someone who has only seen the facade that the other person has put up whenever they are out on dates.
Oh, and a quick note about Michael Douglas, he is an excellent actor, but he is a freak, and this isn't because he is a sex addict. Now that i think of it, there isn't a movie of his that I've seen that didnt involve him having sex. So using him as proof against premarital sex is just as bad as using Charlie Sheen who collects porn stars like many kids collect Pokemon cards, and actually out-screwed Ron Jeremy, who IS a porn star or John Holmes, a porn star who died of AIDS in the 80's.
gaileeflores
Up-and-Coming Sensation
Wouldn't the priest give you a holy condom? :lol:[/quote]
haha. :lol: i love reading that. haha
haha. :lol: i love reading that. haha
Number #1 reason divorce is so high?
Cheating
Number #2
Sexual differences (which is linked to number one).
I used be be neutral on the topic but for the past couple of years I've come to realize that if people don't ride that hobby horse then they cannot find if they are compatible. This is a problem most christian newlyweds face. It's goes unshowed in stats often as well because Christian tend to refuse to share their sexual problems with others and many even refuse to divorce because of the Sin thing.
Still if couples do play the hoci-poki early it doesn't solve this problem because most womens' sex drive goes down in the years. Often women will go from "Yay, sex is fun" to "Ok, you've been good hubby, here's a favor for you".
For me sexual problems is my worst trouble in marriage. Though, different than my example above, It's still not fun at all.
Cheating
Number #2
Sexual differences (which is linked to number one).
I used be be neutral on the topic but for the past couple of years I've come to realize that if people don't ride that hobby horse then they cannot find if they are compatible. This is a problem most christian newlyweds face. It's goes unshowed in stats often as well because Christian tend to refuse to share their sexual problems with others and many even refuse to divorce because of the Sin thing.
Still if couples do play the hoci-poki early it doesn't solve this problem because most womens' sex drive goes down in the years. Often women will go from "Yay, sex is fun" to "Ok, you've been good hubby, here's a favor for you".
For me sexual problems is my worst trouble in marriage. Though, different than my example above, It's still not fun at all.
If you want to wait until you wed, wait. If you don't, don't. You don't see people getting struck by lightning for fornication before getting wed. Free will is quite a beautiful thing... 🙂
InFiNiTy™ said:
Different strokes for different folks... I think it would suck to be married with someone you aren't physically/sexually compatible with. ...but what would suck more I think is to marry someone then find out you're not sexually compatible then you ultimately get a divorce.. yes, marriage is about more than just sex but it's also about being able to be intimate in a whole another level and being partners for life and share everything.
I was always blown away by married couples eventually having their own separate rooms in the house because they no longer sleep with each other (literally and figuratively). In my opinion that's just weird to me.
This question is pretty difficult to answer. I think a couple who are mature enough to handle the consequences of having sex and love each other truly should have it before marriage. However, it's always better to do it after you are married.
PS: I ain't religious or anything.
PS: I ain't religious or anything.
Petlover500
Familiar Face
I believe after mairrage, because I am a Christian 🙂
For me it is after marriage,who will wait for marriage to have sex? Like when you are young and wild,i don't really think you will say to your partner to wait for marriage before doing that. But everyone has different opinions on that. I had sex before marriage or anything so i can't really tell that i am that kind of person to wait for marriage to do that.
Coming from an agnostic point of view, I think it should be up to the couple. If they want to stay pure until after their wedding, then so be it. If the couple does want to engage in such activity, and they are legal age of consent, then I think that should be okay too. People should do what they are comfortable with, because in the long run, that's what keeps a relationship solid.
Andyman9491
Reputable
I'm waiting until marriage. Idk why. I mean, it really doesn't bother me if I did before marriage anyway. Sex is a need.
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